This is me typing away furiously just trying to get down whatever comes up to my mind. It was the last day of the Term 3 Exams today. I know I've been away from my blog for a while now.
Can you believe it's already March now? I can't! I just don't want to grow up as Kizzy said.
Honestly I can't express my thoughts freely and express them fast enough since I'm a person who just doesn't have the ability to share her expressions and thoughts to others. Though I really do want to! I guess there's always time to learn. Another reason is that I don't type fast enough or grammatically well that I feel like a failure! My writing/typing has been getting worse and worse and worse and worse!
I painted my nails in a cheetah print today! I'm so proud of myself! A khaki base, with pink dots and black shapes of "C" all around the nail until quite filled. Though it has been messy and the nail polishes seem to melt away when I placed a top coat, I'm still proud of myself. There's also this funny incident where since I can't draw with my left hand, I asked matt to help me draw the "C"'s and to our amusement and all since the ink was hard to get out (either jammed or malfunctioning), Matt shook the nail paint pen furiously even when i tried to stop him. Then when he went back to the computer after failing to draw well on my nails, he suddenly exclaimed that there was a large black dot on the 'F' key and thats when I looked down to the wooden floor to see splatters of the black ink all over the floor! We both panicked! But no worries, we cleaned it up quite well with nail polish remover!
Oh! I just read part of a friend Natasha (Tata- Missing Chemistry) 's sort of blog-y thing. I'm quite jealous of her how she gets her words flowing and she sounds sophisticated and such in a way where I've always wanted to write in that way. As in type in that way in a blog. Though I can't read my own blog in the way if I were another person reading a random person's writing.
I wonder what I sound like, what people think of me, how people view me? Am I odd, am I a special case? I've never thought I would be the weird one people would talk behind my back about. I always felt that I fit in many social clusters. I'm hoping *fingers crossed* I would learn to be a people person where people would know my name and see me as a role model. Pleasepleasepleasepleaseplease!
I did the last exam today, Biology and Art & Design. I hate Raffles. But this is not the part where I steam off to complain. I'm not here to complain about the school. Nope, Nada, not a peep about hating it directly at least! I did the art for 4 and a half hours! Can you believe that? Nothing but boredom. Though I was quite pleased with my art today and I regret not using my Arches Paper since I really think everything would be well if I did use it! I'm too used with the good Arches Paper!
Tomorrow friends are coming over to bake and cook so we could sell them in Church on Sunday to raise funds for a Teen's Retreat! It should be fun! Both the baking and cooking tomorrow and the upcoming planned Teens Retreat should be fantastic!
I'm definitely typing much today! Papa and Mama are away at a bible talk, Matt is asleep, the maids are asleep, so I'm awake alone on a friday night. Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
I want and wish to be pretty. Did you know that when I was younger, I actually wished I could grow even more beautiful and pretty every time someone told me to make a wish. An eyelash on my cheek, pick it up and make a wish, pull out a hair while sitting on the steps just daydreaming, make a wish then place the hair back onto my scalp (silly isn't it?). Blow out birthday candles, make a wish. Find a 4 leaf clover, make a wish.
I don't know exactly when or where did I stop this habit of mine, making wishes to be pretty and princess-y.
I saw in a picture with words from Kizzy's laptop today in her files of tumblr pictures that "Our brains make us see ourselves in the mirror as 5x more beautiful" I'm shocked. I don't know whether to lower my self esteem and think that I must be really ugly since I look Plain Jane, or should I think I'm pretty and that I don't need to worry about it? I know everyone is special and unique and beautiful in their own personal way.
What do you think? Am I pretty?
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